Couples Counseling Worcester MA: 7 Tips for More Presence
Couples Counseling Worcester MA provides tips on how to be more mindful of how we use our phones
I don’t know about you, but it feels like we're all so plugged in these days, and everything is synced to our phones.
If we want to listen to music, we reach for our phones. If we're on vacation and want to take a picture, we grab our phones. How many times have you been in a conversation with a friend, engaging in a friendly debate, only for one of you to grab your phone to settle the argument? Or when you want to cook or bake something, the recipe is right there at your fingertips.
The issue is that while we use this amazing technology, we often get sucked into distractions we didn’t intend to explore.
I’ve been guilty of opening my phone to play a favorite song, only to get sidetracked by a text, an email, or a social media post, and before I know it, I’ve fallen down a dark winding rabbit hole. Then, I completely forget what I originally intended to do.
If you are noticing yourself going down the phone rabbit hole, it may also have an impact on your relationships that you are not intending. Just the act of looking at your phone sends the message that you are not available, that you are distracted, and not focused on the moment and the people you are with.
Here are 7 tips for being more intentional with your phone use:
1. Keep your phone in another room: If you want to check your phone, you’ll have to actively seek it out. This makes it an intentional act rather than mindlessly grabbing it because it’s right next to you.
2. Turn off notifications: The ping of a notification is distracting and pulls you away from the task or person you're focused on. Plus, that sound conditions you to automatically check your phone without thinking about it. Personally, I can’t ignore that ping — it makes me curious about who’s messaging me and what they’re saying.
3. Set your phone to airplane mode or "Do Not Disturb": This way, you won’t be interrupted by calls, texts, or notifications while you're focused on something else.
4. Make apps harder to access: Move apps to folders that are buried deeper in your phone. This creates a time gap between your impulse to check an app and actually opening it, helping break the habit of mindlessly scrolling.
5. Keep your phone out of the bathroom: I know a lot of people are guilty of bringing their phones into the bathroom, but think about it — it’s kinda gross. Plus, spending prolonged time on your phone while sitting on the toilet (especially while scrolling social media) can increase the risk of developing hemorrhoids. The longer you sit, the more pressure you put on your nether region — no thank you!
6. Have phone-free meals: When you’re sitting down with your loved ones for a meal, keep phones off the table. Studies have shown that even having a phone visible on the table can affect the quality of conversation and connection.
7. Create a phone-free bedroom: The bedroom should be a space for sleep and intimate moments, not for screen time. Keeping your phone out of the bedroom can help improve the quality of your sleep.
Think about your relationship with your phone and how it is serving you or not serving you.
Think about what you would like to be different and consider experimenting with one of the above suggestions. Try one out for a week and see what you notice. Do you notice your stress levels decreasing? Do you feel more connected with others around you? Also, the first few days may increase stress and anxiety, but if you are able to work past that initial discomfort, I wonder how you will feel at the end of the week?
